A Spiritual Connection In The Making...

A Spiritual Connection In The Making...

So I'm gonna be honest.... I feel like this is about to be my best journal entry yet because today was just complete..... Ive missed you so much, everyday i'm waiting on these eye emojiis to come to my phone... lol I was so happy to see you come up on my phone today. It was such a relief..... I was glad to hear you were able to make it to see your family, even though it was a short time frame anything counts! but I do love you being around family. It fuels you and believe it or not you being around them fuels them as well. Everyone loves Mary around lol! but yeah i definitely want you to be around your family I was ready for you to tell me you wanted to go back because I would have definitely made that happen for you.  But today was interesting... we texted most majority of the day...and then voice notes back and forth to each other.....(I SAVED EVERYONE JUST TO REPLAY YOUR VOICE ON MY OWN TIME) ...shit i dont mind being transparent... I miss your voice. I miss everything about you. And then you putting me on this new J.Cole. When you gave me the assignment to listen to this I was ready you hear me lol but i needed that nap! I know we talked about The Let Out being the best song by far but as im typing my journal currently i keep randomly screaming lol " GTF Up Out MY Face WHATYOUTALMBOUT lol ...yeah you did something finding them songs. but never did i realize the topic of music would introduce me to a totally new version of you.....A spiritual version of you..... Its amazing how the deep connection of lyrics in songs resonate with you.....ive been like that for life....and to find out you read the lyrics lmao! yeah just alike! But all jokes aside you got me very interested in a version of you ive never seen before..... It's more of a calm, healing Mary. I hear it in your tone when you speak.... the confidence in your tone as you tell me your thoughts and perception on the spiritual presence of life.... You're meditating now, you have your crystals, you pray more, you're becoming aligned with you! The fact of you wanting to be more eager to learn more things and be more teachable to others is everything. Even when you said You prefer to be righteous than right... something along those lines. And also im interested in knowing about the God in you.... your throat and heart chakras i think it is...I want to know this new version of you.... You not having no one to talk to about this is crazy to me because who wouldnt want to learn from you... You give life Mary without even realizing it..... and im tired of being opinionated.... the more i listen and pay attention to you makes me feel liek ive been living life completely wrong this whole time.... but then again lets me know that a new journey of spiritual love might just begin in a deeper fashion than we could have imagined.....I mean what if we had to go through the worse to where we feel completely empty to clear up space to soak up the true spiritual meaning of love...... me letting down my guard, becoming vulnerable, becoming transparent, not making excuses, has shifted my whole meaning to life....im fucking journaling lol and I havent stopped typing yet... because I want you to see what you always seen in me.....My Heart... the beat i carry in my heart is from the rythym and chemistry we share....You make me better....I didnt see it but I do now. And because I am committed to this journey im always gonna be committed to pouring in you and fueling your aspirations in life. SO if i have to meditate with you....teach me...I'll learn.......you helped me discover my God....and no tears, no text messages, no journaling, or calls will ever be able to show you that... But I Promise You For As Long As I Get The Blessing To Be In Your Life..... Moving forward I will make life a day to remember each day because life without you is empty.... and this vision of a new Spiritual Love journey with you is just everything worth looking for!  But mam I done wrote a whole damn book.... but I'm loving recording my love for you.... its my way of talking to you without you interrupting lol IM JP! but its my way of saying I love you Mary....when you feel like you need to question anything!  Youre coming over tomorrow morning and tomorrow night lord I cant even sleep im so happy to see you! I just wanna talk talk talk! hell i wanna go to work with you and talk all day ill take a 5 hour energy for this lol but tomorrow....... im looking forward to it! and im sorry i got the ryan gosling picture as the pic for this journal entry but honestly this is exactly how I felt from every message received from you today. I LOVE YOU MARY! & of course I prayed for you again!❤️